The Wallet Wasn’t the Problem

So, after work, I leave the office pretty pressed. And while I’m driving back home, I realise, I can’t do this.

I find the next closest filling station and stop at the BP on the N1. I go to the bathroom, and I have my wallet, my car keys and my cell phone with me because I think I’m going to buy myself a cold beverage, maybe a water.

But then I decide against it and just get back in the car to drive home.

An hour later, I get to Carnival Mall because I need to get some medication from Clicks. I start looking for my wallet and suddenly realise that I think I’ve lost it.

I phone the garage, and they start asking me questions. Was it the BP on the N1 South or the N1 North? And goodness me, all I know is that there was a McDonald’s and a Wild Bean Café there.

But apparently that is not enough information because, of course, both of them have a McDonald’s and a Wild Bean Café. 😭

And somehow, that was enough to make me cry.

I’m standing there talking to some of the security personnel on the phone, trying to figure out what to do, and eventually I decide I’m going to go inside the mall and use my phone to pay for my medication.

I stand up.

And realise that I have been sitting on my wallet the entire time.

😭😭😭

And the funny thing is, even after I found it, the tears just kept rolling.

That’s when I realised that this wasn’t really about the wallet.

The wallet was just the trigger.

I think I had already reached my limit before I even got to the garage. The wallet was just the thing that finally broke whatever little bit of composure I had left.

Sometimes you think you’re crying because of the thing that just happened, but really, you’re crying because of everything that happened before it.

Today, I think I just needed to cry.

And maybe that’s okay.

Happy Tuesday.

My Happy Heart 

I've read a couple of times of how important it is to do what you love. Other people don't have that luxury. Its usually all about what puts food on the table.

Today, my heart smiled. For the past 2 weekends, I've been lucky enough to work on an entrepreneurial competition as a tutor to some of the contestants. 

The heart warming moment when a contestant comes at the end of the day to come and thank you beats being told you are loved by some boy. When you help kick starts a person's thought process, and just being there to answer even the simplest of questions... This is a feeling like no other.

I know one thing, I was made for this. This is what I was born for. To teach. To help, and more than anything, I was made to make people smile. 

This is the kind of feeling that I wish for you all. :) 

UNTITLED

This is one of the very few times where I am just lost for words. 2015 is a big year for our country. Its exactly 21 years ago when South Africa was declared a democratic country, this was wonderful news as it meant that our country now belonged to all those who live in it. It meant that we would all live in peace and harmony, that whatever oppression was faced was no more. It was also a year in which both I and many of my friends were born. Born into a country we'd all be proud of.
The recent xenophobic attacks have left so much for all of us to wonder. Are we really free? Does our country really belong to ALL those who live in it?! Has oppression really ended?! Are all these things only on paper?! On some constitution that can be found on a government website and is never read?!
Nevertheless, my heart bleeds and is saddened by the recent happenings in the KwaZulu Natal and Gauteng province. What is even more sad is the potential of such actions spreading throughout our country. All it takes is for a group of mobilised individuals and they good to go.
Why are we even at a point as a country of having to write, discuss and talk about such?! Way before 1994, many of our known and unsung heroes resided in many African countries. The grandchildren of those that helped the likes of Nelson Mandela are the very same people we are killing, stoning and burning to death.
If you, like I, are against Xenophobia join in the movement and include the #NoToXenophobia movement across all social networks.


Emancipate yourself from mental slavery,
None but ourselves can free our minds- Bob Marley, Redemption Song.

I AM ENOUGH

So I just realized that this blog writing business is not easy. Having written my previous post about a week ago, I was so convinced that I would be able to do this on a daily basis... I guess I was wrong. Coming up with content that I'd think my audience would enjoy isn"t easy. I did come across some inspiration this morning after a friend of mine had sent me a link to a YouTube video she thought i'd enjoy watching ( I have shared the link :)  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kuoBEJ9DkJM ). Titled #ImEnough, a number of woman stood in front of an interactive mirror without knowing what to expect. How many people look in the mirror in the morning and feel as though they not enough and just ugly? These ladies didn't know what to expect at first but then they realized the mirror started talking to them. It also showed them personalized messages from their families and friends reassuring them just how appreciated they are. Ladies, and Gents YOU ARE ENOUGH. I've taken on a 10 day mirror challenge, for the next 10 days i'm going to appreciate me for who and what I am and encourage you to do the same. Its time we realize that being beautiful isn't about physical appearance but our own personal self worth. Till next time.

YOU ARE ENOUGH

WELCOME

So this is my very first post. well obviously. I have to admit I am not much of a writer, but the thought of others reading anything that I am to publish does excite me. The title of my blog " ELL TWICE" comes from the first letters of my name and surname, pronounced as L TWICE. I am a first year student at the University of Johannesburg, studying towards becoming an Educator, a profession that I believe is of the highest honour. How many people are fortunate enough to invest in the future of young people for not only the recipients but for our society as well? OK, I think ill end here for now. Till I write again.

CHEERS